Continuing the Journey



This week I have been battling a head cold. I love the fall in New England, but getting a head cold is just plain miserable.  However as I have rested on the couch, I have spent time reevaluating where my writing is going and where I want it to go.

As I wrote last week, I have started on this new journey of self-discovery. I have found that I have missed me, missed having the confidence that I used to have and the insane ability to think I could do anything I wanted. Well, maybe not anything….but my life goal now is to be a full time writer.

I have three books out now. As I finished my fourth book in June and am about a third away through my fifth, I have come to realize that my writing has changed as I weave myself on this journey of self discovery. My writing has become strong, much like myself. I find my female characters becoming stronger women, and although they want love and romance, they are independent and strong. They have a quiet inner strength that only comes from learning in life.  Please feel free to check out my books here.

My writing goals have expanded into having projects planned for well into next year. There will be new releases coming from me regularly, whether I continue to indie publish or continue on a path of hybrid where I will continue to work with traditional publishers as well as indie publish.

So where does this new journey take me in my personal life? Well, I continue to look for a day job that will supplement paying the bills as I am once again out of work for the third time in two years. With businesses closing, my employment has been a challenge with my last two jobs ending due to a business closing and one selling. Although I am in need of a job, my heart longs to just write full time and fill my day with filling pages with my stories that spin around in my mind.

So with another job interview tomorrow and then a road trip for some book research this weekend, I am taking notes furiously for the next few books, one of which I am dying to get started on. As soon as I finish the current one, the next one will start flowing which already I know will be a story that will be near and dear to my heart. Stay tune for more updates on the journey of my life and finding myself.

A New Journey



I have been remiss in keeping up with my blog in the past couple of years.  So today I start on a new journey, a journey that I hope you will take with me. What goes into a writer’s life? How does a writer keep up with their writing when their life is falling apart around them?

Well, I’m going to open up a bit of my life to you, my readers, to share how the passion of writing stays with me even through the curveballs that life throws at me. Two years ago I went through a divorce. It was not an easy thing to go through, as anyone who has gone through one will know. Not only did my life seem to be crumbling around me, but my future and the plans that we had made for down the road were suddenly ripped out from under me. So in the aftermath of that divorce, I found myself in a place of questioning many aspects in my life.

It was about that time that I also lost my job. So with all the curveballs being thrown my way, I took a sabbatical from writing for about a year. I just couldn’t focus on the stories within me beyond the overwhelming stress that seemed to be hitting me on every side.

As I slowly took stock of my life around me and the fact that I had a couple more years until all my kids were graduated from high school leaving me with an empty nest, I realized I had lost sight of who the real me was. For the past year I have spent a lot of time reflecting on my past and how much I have lost the joy I had in living. Don’t get me wrong. My children are an amazing source of joy to my life on a daily basis. But I had allowed myself to lose sight of ME, of what made me happy and being able to see my own strengths and abilities. I had lost myself in two bad marriages where I walked on eggshells to keep the peace. I spent so much time trying to keep an even keel in my house for the sake of my kids that I lost who I was.

In the process of coming to the realization that I need to find myself again, I have started on a journey in the past year that brings me to a place of wonder and fear. I am amazed at how much I forgot about myself and yet I am fearful for what the future holds for me as I move forward. 

So join me on this journey as I blog through finding my way back to my true self and the trials I will face over the coming year as I prepare myself to sell my house and find something smaller, as I move forward with my writing career and I find my path in this newly forming life of mine. My hope is that maybe one of you, my readers, will relate to things that I am going through and know that you’re not alone.

TRUSTING LOVE now available to preorder

I am so excited for the release of my newest book, TRUSTING LOVE due out on December 10, 2013.  This is my third book, second romantic suspense, which centers around domestic violence.  People, in my opinion, have no idea what women go through when they are abused.  It's not easy to ask for help and get out of the situation.  Women in abusive situations are run by fear and intimidation. So here is what Trusting Love is about.

CHLOE WILDER is newly pregnant and running from her abusive boyfriend.  She needs a home more than ever before.  Chloe takes refuge in Arden, Maine - a sleepy, coastal town where she finally thinks she can be safe.
JAYDEN PETERSON abandoned his career as a city cop after accidentally shooting a child. Jayden quickly agrees to fill his father’s shoes as Arden’s police chief. Determined to protect his loved ones and unsure if he can ever pull his gun again, Jayden is relieved to stay where the worst crime that will ever happen is jaywalking - or so he thinks.

You can at this time pre-order a print copy here and it will be shipped just as soon as it is available.  They make great Christmas gifts for those readers in your life.

New Release

I am so excited about my upcoming release -- TRUSTING LOVE.  It has been sent off to the editor, a release date has been set (December 10, 2013) and I am working with my cover artist to get an awesome cover, and for this book I have started working with a new marketing team.  Good things are happening!

What a process it is to get a book to the point where it is ready for release.  Writing alone is a huge process.  The steps it takes to produce a book that you hope your readers will enjoy and want to share with others. For me my writing process may be a bit different than other authors.  My first draft consists of a skeleton draft really.  I get the basic plot out and don't edit at all as I write.

The second pass through is spent putting in details, description and missing elements needed for those never ending plot twists required in suspense.  The third and fourth pass is then spent diving into the edits, changing point of views, fixing gaps in timelines or plot structure before making a final read through.  As I hit send and it goes off to my editor, I cross my fingers and hope she likes it.

Once it is off, the excitement of it all begins.  Setting the release date, working with marketing and the process of selecting picture ideas to send to the cover artists.  There is nothing like the feeling of first seeing your cover, and then the excitement all over again when the book is in your hand, a finished project.

So what is TRUSTING LOVE about?  Good question.  Here is just a little hint of what you can expect.

CHLOE WILDER is newly pregnant and running from her abusive boyfriend.  She needs a home more than ever before.  Chloe takes refuge in Arden, Maine - a sleepy, coastal town where she finally thinks she can be safe.

JAYDEN PETERSON abandoned his career as a city cop after accidentally shooting a child. Jayden quickly agrees to fill his father’s shoes as Arden’s police chief. Determined to protect his loved ones and unsure if he can ever pull his gun again, Jayden is relieved to stay where the worst crime that will ever happen is jaywalking - or so he thinks.

Love and Vulnerability

As I start plotting out a couple more books, and as always life events tend to shape that process, I start looking at what is it about love that makes people vulnerable? In my own life, I have been been through good and bad, like most people. I have moments that I thought I was so totally in love that I didn't believe anything could penetrate that and destroy it, but as there have also been times I have been hurt I now make a conscious decision to keep my heart guarded from that which makes me vulnerable.

What's that moment in time that you consciously decide you can't take the hurt or pain any more and never want to go through it again....yet in the back of your mind you still hope for that happily ever after and the one true love that will always be there for you. As a writer, I get to write that ending in my stories and portray that hope for that type of love through my stories.

I have spent a great deal of time in the past week thinking about this. About the risks of putting your heart out there after you have been hurt. We all want to be that priority in someone's life, be the one that they think of first thing when they wake up and last thing when they go to bed, be that one that brings a smile to their face during the day just because they are thinking of you. How do you protect your heart from the hurt that could follow when you make yourself vulnerable.

In The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis penned a lesson on the danger of holding one’s heart too tightly. He writes:

    To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.

After stumbling across the above statement, and doing an exhausting amount of thinking on this subject this week, I have come to the conclusion that it is much better to put your heart out there and run the risk of getting it broken once again than to have it become unbreakable, impenetrable and irredeemable.  I would rather love and be vulnerable than hide my heart away in the name of protection.

What's Your Comfort Zone?

I am feeling a bit remiss that I haven't been here putting out a blog post as regularly as I had been.  It's been a crazy year.  Lots going on and yet its no excuse.

So although it's not New Year's, I have a new resolution to start my blog back up and be blogging regularly again.  Thank you to those who have hung in with me when I have been sporadic. The past year has been crazy, like I said. But to just recap the past several months I have had a daughter get engaged, return to college for her final year (until grad school), another daughter head off for her first year in college and my son go into his junior year in high school.

I've been adjusting to the house being quiet with just my son there, started a new job, which allows me to write more on a full time basis and on top of all of it have finished my third book, TRUSTING LOVE. I'm excited about this story for so many reasons.  The empowerment of a facing your fears and regaining broken trust is the theme throughout the story. My goal is to have this book released at the end of November.

With so many changes going on I have found myself stretching my comfort zone, which is extremely difficult for me, by attending a few conferences.  I'm so fortunate to have daughters who encourage me and push me when I dig in my heels and decide I just don't want to step out of that comfortable area I have. Although I look forward to going and always have a great time once I get there, the few days before I leave I'm a ball of nerves.

How often do you get stuck in a comfortable place and drag your heels about trying something new? Or are you an adventurous person, always looking to jump into the new and exciting thing?

Roller Coaster

There will be highs and lows in your life much like a roller coaster, however, it is how you endure them that makes the person that you are and who you can become.

I'm a romance writer and I believe in love. Yet, love isn't easy.  There are highs and lows. The romantic in me believes that you can endure those high and lows with the right kind of commitment. I truly believe that when you meet the love of your life you know it -- even if it takes you awhile to figure out it is love. I can say this as for years I had the strongest feelings for one man. I never would have classified it as love, but all I knew is that he made my heart skip when he walked in a room.  Years later after many highs and lows that man came back into my life.  As we renewed friendship, those feelings were the same for me as they had been so many years ago.  At this point in my life I thought I had been in love before, but it was never a lasting feeling, nor did it give me the courage to be the person I knew I could be.

When did I realize I was truly in love?  When I heard four little words, words I wasn't expecting.  "I love you, too."  Love me too??  I wasn't in love, or was I?  Knowing you're in love doesn't give you the realization of how love will effect your life.  In fact, it was years into our marriage that I realized I truly didn't know how to love unconditionally.  Unconditional love is choosing to love someone regardless of behavior. It's not getting mad and walking away, or withholding saying "I love you" because you are angry.  It's a choice that you make to continue to love regardless of the hurt you maybe feeling.

Only that kind of love can withstand the roller coaster ride of life.  If you find the one that loves you unconditionally as well, the roller coaster ride will only bring you closer.  That kind of love grows through the storms that you weather together. And what if your love doesn't know how to love unconditionally? Do you walk away and write it off as a mistake?  No, you continue with your choice of unconditional love. The love that life's ebbing tides can't wash away.


So have you found that person who you choose to love unconditionally, no matter what?  That person who as you love them unconditionally, you realize the person you are and who you can be?

Mirrored Deception



I am so excited to release my second book, Mirrored Deception.  Here is an excerpt.  I hope you enjoy.



Chapter 1

“I will not hire a bodyguard!” Jayla Ralston stormed across the room. She righted a small bookshelf and started picking up the books from the floor. “You’re overreacting once again.” Jayla couldn’t believe her sister would even suggest such a thing. 

“How can you say that?” Jenna’s eyes moved over the mess as she racked her fingers through her hair. “Your apartment has been broken into and trashed. You’re being impossible. What do you think Mom and Dad would want you to do if they were here?”

“That’s a completely unfair question.” Jayla closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Jenna had a way of hitting below the belt using their parents to create guilt, knowing only too well it worked every time. 

Jayla grabbed the broom from the closet off the living room to sweep up the broken shards of glass from pictures that had been scattered about the room. “I will think about it, okay?” she whispered, only wanting to make peace with her twin.

“You know I love you, Jayla. I just don’t want anything to happen to you.” Jenna’s voice softened. “I worry about you.”

“I know, but you really don’t have to. I don’t think he will bother me again.” Jayla’s voice broke. She wished she could show more confidence. Looking at the two of them was like looking in a mirror. They were identical, and yet very different.

             “I’ve got to go, sis. Will you be okay?”

“Of course, Jen. I’m fine. I’ll just clean up.” Jayla walked her to the door and hugged her close. “I love you. Please don’t worry.” 

As she shut the door and turned to survey the damage: the overturned chair and knick-knacks scattered about the living room, Jayla choked back the tears. How could he have done this to her? Her pictures of her family were broken and strewn about the floor. A bodyguard wasn’t needed. What was needed to get away from it all. 

She turned and headed to the bedroom. Dragging a couple of suitcases out of the closet, Jayla started throwing clothes into them. She debated whether to call Jenna and decided against it. She wanted to disappear and give herself a chance to think. Jenna would only be telling her she couldn’t run from her problems, but to meet them head on.

She needed more than this. Jayla slammed the suitcases, grabbed her laptop and headed outdoors. She threw the bags in the trunk and gave a good look around the parking lot. Convinced no one was around, she jumped in and started the car. She pulled her hair back in an elastic band and pulled from the parking lot. With no destination in mind, Jayla aimed for the coast.

For the first few miles, Jayla kept a watchful eye out for anyone following. After an hour it became clear she was the only one on the road. Her grip loosened on the steering wheel, the tension leaving her shoulders. As she rolled the windows down to smell the cool ocean breeze, Jayla’s mind wandered. She wanted her life back -- yet, she wanted a different life. She was filled with many regrets of late.

Driving the coastal route, she paid no mind to the time until her stomach grumbled reminding her she’d missed dinner, and she became very aware of the time. Dark shadows had crept across the landscape. She clicked on the headlights, realizing the gas gauge read empty. How could she take off on a whim without thinking of fueling up? She could hear levelheaded Jenna now -- “never thinking”.  

At a bend in the road, the headlights illuminated a sign for a bed and breakfast, The Cliffhouse. There was a sign below for vacancies. Jayla perked up a bit. At least it wasn’t far ahead and it would do for the night.

            She turned into the entrance and drove up the winding, cobblestone driveway. Around the last turn, a large Victorian house came into view. The place was dark. Not surprising since it was ten o’clock. Hopefully someone was still up.

Jayla sat there for a moment and wondered if they were open. The needle on the gas gauge hovered just at empty; she had no choice but see if they had a room for the night.

            She grabbed her small overnight bag and left the rest of the luggage in the car. After locking the car doors, she walked briskly up the steps of the veranda, past the wicker furniture.  In the dark, Jayla rang the bell and waited. She shivered, straining to see beyond the porch. She wrapped her arms around her middle and paced in front of the door. The hairs on the back of her neck tingled with the sense of being watched. But that could be. This place was out in nowhere. Jayla shook off the sensation—just remnants of the god awful day.

            Jayla rapped on the door with impatience.

            “Yes, I’m coming,” responded a male voice from inside.

            The door swung open. Finally.

            She was about to speak, but when she got her first look at him, words couldn't get past her lips.
The man filling the door leaned nonchalantly against the doorjamb and studied her. His tousled dark hair looked as if he'd just got out of bed. His tanned, bare chest had her pulse racing. “Yes?" 

Just that single word brought a sizzle of awareness coursing through her body. “I'm...er...sorry. I didn't realize the time and I was running out of gas." 

 He glanced over her shoulder, to the car and back. Perfectly shaped eyebrows rose while sensuous brown eyes surveyed her from head to toe. Okay, she probably didn’t look too presentable after the long road trip. The salty air had given her skin that needs-to-be washed feel. Forget about the lipstick, which had undoubtedly been gone for hours. 

His scrutiny made her uneasy. Surely he could say more than one word?   
 
"Do you have a room available?" Jayla shoved a lock of hair behind her ear.

He stood upright away from the door without a word. Jayla couldn't help but notice how his well-worn jeans looked like they'd been hastily zipped up, the tab partially undone.

"Come in." He stepped aside. 

           She followed. The foyer was small, but well kept. He stopped at a desk and turned. "How long are you staying?"

"Tonight, maybe longer." Jayla tried to read him. He didn't invite small talk. "I'm Jayla, Jayla Ralston."

"Okay, Jayla." He said her name slowly, almost seductively. "Sign here. Name's Tristan."

She nodded and leaned down to complete the paperwork. She looked up and met his dark brown eyes. Her pulse ratcheted up another beat. There was something in his sharp look that held her gaze. 

He finally broke the spell and gestured for Jayla to follow him to her room. "If you need anything, I'll be around in the morning."

Jayla let out a deep breath. This place might do after all. No one would look for her here. Alone at last. She dug out her laptop and started to write. 

The change was just beginning.
***
            He watched until after midnight when the house had finally gotten dark. Only one guest had checked in tonight. The only light left on was the one on the veranda.

            He slipped around to the west side of the building, treading carefully on the pebbled walkway, not wanting to leave any footprints. He had watched the house for months and knew the west side wing was empty and that there didn’t appear to be plans to fill the rooms even in the busy months of the summer. At the side door that once was the servant’s entrance, he ran his hand along the top of the doorframe, and found the key put there years ago -- sixteen years. 

            He chuckled. The poor fool probably forgot it was there, or forgot anyone else knew it was there. The key slid easily into the lock. It still worked. He let himself in and shut the door, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the dark, though it didn’t matter, this place was as familiar as the back of his hand. Pocketing the key, he started for the back stairs carrying one bag—that held all his belongings.

            He had come back to claim what was rightfully his and claim it he would. It might take some time to get. Halfway up the stairs, he stopped and listened. There were no sounds, only the sound of his breathing. He shook his head and continued up to the first bedroom. Trenton laid on the bed fully clothed, eyes closed. He couldn’t let his memory play tricks on him. They were gone. He had survived. He was back - and would make sure certain people paid for what he had been through.


Copies are available at Amazon.com  or if you would like to order an autographed copies ($10 each), please do so here.

When Heroes Fail

Has your hero ever failed you?

There are times as we are writing that our heroes miss the road we want them to go down and decide to take another route. Is that a failure in your writing or do you allow the character to take over and change the plot? In real life sometimes our heroes miss the road you want them to take. Is that a failure on that part or an expectation that is just too high to reach?

If you love your hero, whether on the pages or in real life, the unexpected turn won't throw you completely off track.  On the pages, you will be able to run with it and continue the storyline -- sometimes a much better storyline that you had anticipated in the beginning.  In real life, if you love that hero, you will continue to love them regardless of failed expectations.

On the pages of your story, you strive for the happily ever after. Do you strive for that with your hero in real life? The one thing I have learned over the past few years is that real love doesn't fail us. Regardless of life circumstances and failures of the people we love, we continue to love them unconditionally. The road may not take you where you had expected to go, and even if you don't feel it is a better storyline, you go with it. Regardless of the outcome, it will be a better storyline if your love is unconditional and true.

On the pages, you can correct that failure of your hero. In real life, when your hero fails you, continue to love them anyway.

Has your hero ever failed you?

When Life Throws Curve Balls -- Find The Blessings

There are times we go along thinking that our life in on track and moving nicely, making plans for the future and just being content with where we are.  Then here it comes -- a curve ball.  It can totally derail your thoughts, your ability in dealing with day to day life and a feeling of grief.

Over the years I have had numerous curve balls thrown at me in this journey of life. Moving through each one, facing them head-on, has been the only way I have been able to get through.  With each chaotic moment, I find my faith growing and a change in my perspective towards things and people.

I believe in the power of prayer.  Prayer can be a powerful tool if done with the right heart.  Have I seen miracles over the years?  Absolutely.  I have seen my son, diagnosed with autism who was completely nonverbal when he was younger and told that he wouldn't be verbal until well into his grade school years, start verbalizing by age of four.  I have seen my daughter walk away from a car accident that by looking at the car she never should have survived, broken hearts heal, marriages renew and yes, sometimes even fall apart again only to be restored fully in the end.

A good friend of mine last night told me that faithfulness brings blessings. Sometimes in the midst of heartache and crisis, we don't see what is right in front of us. So I sit here this morning counting my blessings.  The first seven of them are my children and my grandson. Looking around at my life, there are numerous blessings that need to be counted daily. As I sit here in the midst of crisis, I know I am held up by God and I can see the blessings coming out of having a faithful and open heart.

What's In a Number?

Please welcome Shelley Bell this morning as she talks about What's In A Number?


When I joined my twelve-step program a couple of years ago, my sponsor told me to stop weighing myself. Too many people, including myself, rely on a number to determine our self-worth. She was right and I stopped. What did it matter what I weighed if I was physically, emotionally and spiritually healthy?
Weight isn’t the only number we obsess about these days. I don’t know about you, but I check my Amazon and Barnes and Noble book rank at least once a day. Sadly, I’ve noticed my moods are affected with the ups and downs of my ranking. It doesn’t matter that I’ve gotten good reviews and accomplished something that I never dreamed possible. I’m focusing on the number. What does that number represent to me? It’s more than merely an indicator of book sales. To me, it represents a long ago buried anxiety of mine- the need to be popular.

Middle school was a difficult time for me as an adolescent. The pressure to be popular ran rampant throughout my network of friends. With a bad haircut, braces, thirty extra pounds and acne, I had no chance of being popular. By the end of seventh grade, most of my friends dropped me like a bad habit. I found a new group, kids who didn’t care about designer labels. They accepted me, bad skin and all.
In high school, I found my clique. We were the theater and choir geeks, not much different than the characters you see on “Glee.” Popularity was irrelevant. I had enough friends and boys to date to keep me busy. 

As an adult, I thought I had outgrown the issue of popularity. Then I entered the world of publishing. All of a sudden, I’m worried about people liking me. Worried about what people think of me. What is my Klout? What is my page ranking? How many Twitter followers do I have? How many likes do I have on my Facebook Page? What is my Alexa score? How many books have I sold? 

These ranks, numbers and scores shouldn’t matter to me, but they do. These days, being an author isn’t just about writing and selling books. Now, we have to worry about what I call the likeability factor. Agents and traditional publishers don’t want to take chances on newcomers unless they can prove they can sell books. They have to have a “platform.” I thought only nonfiction authors were required to have one, but I soon learned that I was wrong.  Agent Rachelle Gardner wrote that authors can build their platform through speaking to large audiences, having high profile visibility in the mainstream media or having a strong internet identity. In other words, they’re expected to be popular. It’s not enough to have talent anymore. Writers must further their own careers by becoming a household name before they even publish a book.

An author’s popularity isn’t based on reality, but on the audience’s perceived image of the author. The crazy thing is that the majority of writers I know are introverts, people who rather curl up on the couch with a good book rather than schmooze with the masses.  Instead of working on their novel, they’re blogging and tweeting and creating their public image. I didn’t play the game in school and I’m not so sure I can do it now. I’ve struggled too long and too hard to accept that I don’t have the control. Nor do I want it. I handed it over to my higher power over two years ago. Though it may hinder my career, I won’t give in to my urge to play the popularity game. I’m going to accept the things I cannot change and change the things I can. I’m going to stay true to myself and not worry about my numbers.

After all, what’s in a number?


Shelly Bell received her Bachelors of Arts in Social Work and a Certificate in Women Studies from Michigan State University and her Juris Doctor from Nova Southeastern University, Shepard Broad Law Center. Practicing law since 1997, she specializes in corporate, environmental and employment law as In-House Legal Counsel for a scrap metal company in Detroit. On the side, she dabbles in horseracing and crematory law. 

She and her husband have two children and reside in the Metro-Detroit area, where she reads on her Kindle each night when her family falls asleep.
A recovering compulsive overeater, she wrote A Year to Remember to share her strength and hope with compulsive overeaters and food addicts everywhere.  A member of Romance Writers of America, she writes both women’s fiction and paranormal romance.


 A Year to Remember is available as an e-book from Amazon ow.ly/93MzC, Barnes and Noble ow.ly/93MBE , and Soul Mate Publishing (for iBooks and other e-readers) ow.ly/93MEv. It will be released in print this summer. 

Follow Shelly at her website and blog at www.shellybellbooks.com. And though she proclaims not to care about popularity, she can be found on Twitter as ShellyBell987, Facebook as ShellyBellBooks, Goodreads, Shelfari, Triberr, LinkedIn, and Pinterest. 

So Much To Learn

I have wrapped up my blog tour for Crashing Hearts and I must say I had a blast doing it.  I met some great authors and readers in the process.

As I am promoting my book, I am finding there is quite a learning curve with the promotion process. Where do you start?  As you know I started with my blog tour.  I have used social media, .i.e. Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, to help get the word out there. Word of mouth is great as well. There have been some reviews posted on Amazon.com, which is exciting for me to see.

As I continue on the journey, I have become more active in Goodreads.  This is a site for readers and authors. You are able to review other books, have people review yours and more. At this juncture, I am involved in a giveaway for Crashing Hearts. The link below will get you there if you are interested in trying to win a free book.

 
 


    Goodreads Book Giveaway
    

        Crashing Hearts by Emma Leigh Reed
   
   

 
 


     
          Crashing Hearts
     
  

          by Emma Leigh Reed            Giveaway ends February 20, 2012.

         
See the giveaway details at Goodreads.
            
      Enter to win
 
 
 

What have you found as authors to be good promotional tools, or as readers what would bring a book to your attention?

Welcome Morgan Wyatt


Please give a warm welcome to Morgan Wyatt who joins us this morning.

Who Writes Erotic Romance Anyhow?


As a Catholic school teacher, I penned serious novels about abused women escaping their abusive mates to carve out a life for themselves and their children. It all sounded rather noble in print, but it wasn’t riveting enough to get published, although an agent did pick it up and went immediately out of business. I am not sure the two were connected. Getting published always managed to elude me.

There was one woman in my former RWA group that managed to get everything she wrote published. She wrote erotic novels, some of the other members whispered as if it were a secret. No secret since she dressed like a character from the cover of her books in a major push-up bra that peeked out from a top barely resting on her shoulders. With her flamboyant hair and tiny stilettos, she became our own regional Dolly Parton.  In my mind, she was the epitome of an erotic romance writer.

Can’t say I knew exactly what an erotic romance writer wrote, but I knew it was hotter than anything I ever wrote. My stories pounded out of the gritty reality of day to day life were less than slinky. They didn’t enter a room on a cloud of perfume and promise, instead they clomped in with a chip on their shoulder.  I was that angry white woman writer.

Something unusual happened. I kept going to workshops, conferences and Nationals and met tons of writers, even ones who confessed to writing erotica. Their ordinariness amazed me. I met school teachers, nurses, grandmothers, and stay-at-home moms that wrote such steamy, and complex tales that I had to ask a few for explanations of how certain things were possible. Sometimes I would argue that they weren’t, but they’d assure me they were. I never asked how they knew.

My image of the erotic romance writer evolved from my flamboyant friend to a middle-aged woman, a mom, a teacher, maybe even someone like myself.  I played with writing hot love scenes, and felt a little silly for my efforts. My first success came when I sent a snippet from a story I wrote to PLAYGIRL Magazine. They published it in their twins edition. I got paid and got a free copy for my efforts, which did not please my husband at that time. I still have the magazine, but not the husband.

Even with that small success, I did not consider myself a writer of steamy scenes until a fateful submission call from Secret Cravings for hot cougar novels. Why not? I gave it a try with my first erotic novel, RELUCTANT COUGAR, whose main character is a fortyish woman who is pursued by a younger man she meets at a funeral.

I followed that novel with my current one, CUB IN BLUE, which details a woman getting passionately involved with a young police officer wounded in the line of duty. I still have another one coming out in February, PUPPY LOVE, followed by two more in the works. Suddenly, I am an erotic romance novelist.
Have I changed to suit my new genre? Not too much, although I am less the angry white woman. Now, I am more the smiling author. Partly because Secret Cravings took a chance on me, but mainly because I took a page from one of my novels and winked at a younger guy, and now I’m marrying him.
What is your image of an erotic romance novelist?
 
Two lucky commenters will get their choice of either RELUCTANT COUGAR or CUB IN BLUE book.
Also go to www.morgankwyatt.com to win Godiva chocolate and a strand of cultured pearls. The answer to the contest question is 9 ½ Weeks. Good Luck. 

Welcome Robin Helm

Please give a warm welcome to Robin.  Robin Helm has published the first two volumes of a trilogy (The Guardian Trilogy), Guardian and SoulFire, and is presently writing Legacy, the third and final volume, posting as a work in progress on four different forums. She has also published two Regency short stories.
She and her husband have two daughters, the elder a Navy nurse stationed in Guam, and the younger a university senior. They live in South Carolina with their Yorkie-Poo, Tobey.
Ms. Helm graduated with a BA from Piedmont Baptist College. She is a member of the Delta Epsilon Chi honor society, the American Legion Auxiliary, and the scholarship faculty of the United States Achievement Academy.

Q: Welcome to my blog, Robin! Tell us a little bit about yourself. When did you start writing?
I have always loved to read. I was the baby in a family of six, and there was always plenty to do in the way of cleaning, cooking, gardening, and yard work. I remember hiding in a closet to read quite often, because if my mother saw me, she would immediately make me put down the book and get to work. I think I bought the house we live in because it has walk-in closets.
After twenty-five years of teaching, mainly high school English and music, I left full-time teaching to take three part-time jobs. I began to “beta,” or edit for other writers. Before that time, the idea of writing a book had been too daunting to me. A year ago, I was intimidated by the idea. Now, I have written and self-published two books in The Guardian Trilogy, Guardian and SoulFire, and I am nearly a third of the way through writing the third book in the series, Legacy.

Q: Tell us about your inspiration for: Guardian (Volume I) and SoulFire (Volume II), from The Guardian Trilogy. What is the true essence of these books?
I confess to being a TwiMom. As a high school English teacher, I wondered why my students would stay up all night reading the books of The Twilight Saga, but they would not read the classics. I read the books several times, and I tried to analyze their appeal. Edward, the protagonist, was a natural bad guy fighting his own nature to be good. He was willing to sacrifice his own desires for Bella, an average human girl, because he loved her. I decided to write the flip side of that – an angel, a being who is totally good, who must battle against his nature and be willing to take a lesser form to love Elizabeth, a supernaturally gifted human. Xander, my angel, wishes to become human to be with Elizabeth. He makes a tremendous sacrifice and accepts mortality, aging, and death in order to be able to love her without sinning.  In addition, he makes this choice not knowing whether or not she will love him in return. He loves her, and she does not know of his existence.
Just as Edward fights his enemies who wish to kill Bella in The Twilight Saga, Xander battles with demonic forces who are intent on destroying Elizabeth in The Guardian Trilogy. Lucifer knows that Xander, the Chief Guardian, would not have been assigned to guard Elizabeth had she not been extremely important in God’s plan, so he sets out to destroy her from the moment of her conception. The Guardian Trilogy delves into spiritual warfare, drawing aside the veil to allow the reader to see parallel dimensions: the physical and the spiritual. Readers are shown what happens around humans all the time without their knowledge as light forces battle dark ones.
On Fanfiction.net I have many crossover teen fans from Twilight, Harry Potter, and Airbender. I have been amazed by that. On that site, I have about two thousand readers from more than eighty countries. Nothing has surprised me as much as the warm reception the books have received from agnostics, atheists, and seekers.
Q: Have you always had an interest in spiritual warfare?  
Yes, I have. I always taught in religious schools, and assigned reading for my students included Frank Peretti’s This Present Darkness, Piercing the Darkness, and The Oath, as well as Larry Burkett’s The Illuminati. Peretti made me think in a different way; his books showed me the spiritual dimension, and I was fascinated.Having said that, my angels, demons, and plot are very different from Peretti’s.
Q: Jane Austen has quite a devoted following - How has your story taken the beloved characters of Fitzwilliam Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett, and brought a new perspective to their classic love story? What will Austen fans love most about The Guardian Trilogy?
The authors for whom I edited wrote Jane Austen fan fiction, and I had been reading the genre for several years before I began to beta. Jane Austen has long been my favorite author, and Pride and Prejudice is my favorite among her works. The Guardian Trilogy is very loosely related to Pride and Prejudice. Xander, the main character, uses the name Darcy when he assumes human form. Elizabeth is his love interest, born to David and Lynne Bennet. Though The Guardian Series does not closely follow Austen’s plot, the characters behave much as their Austen counterparts would in a modern, religious setting. For instance, Xander/Darcy is a protector, much like Austen’s Darcy protected Lydia, Elizabeth’s sister, as well as Elizabeth, by helping Lydia. He has a higher standing than Elizabeth, because he is an angel and she is human. As an angel, Xander is remote and free from strong emotions. He is distant, like Austen’s Darcy. Elizabeth does reject Darcy at one point, much the P & P Elizabeth and Darcy have their Hunsford debacle. Austen fans also require a happy ending for the couple, and they will have it.

Q: If you had to narrow it down to one thing, what would your readers find most enjoyable about your books?
One aspect of the books that has received much comment is the banter between the angels behind the scenes. I give them distinct personalities and some of them are quite humorous and witty.

Q: When will we see your next book in print and where can we find it?
I hope to publish Legacy in late April or early May. Like Guardian and SoulFire, it will be available on Amazon in paperback and on Kindle, and on Nook and paperback through Barnes and Noble. For those with iPhones or iPads, downloading the Kindle application will give readers access to Kindle books.


Guardian begins with a prologue, the fall of Lucifer from heaven. The main body of the work concentrates on the years beginning just prior to Elizabeth’s conception in 1989 and ends in the fall of 2007 as she begins her junior year in college and Xander is summoned before God to make a momentous decision.

The powerful and imposing Xander/Darcy, Chief of all guardian angels, has protected exceptional humans from demonic forces over the course of ten millennia without losing a single battle. In 1989, he receives an unusual assignment which will forever change his ordered existence and alter the course of human history. Will he lose the battle for his own heart while guarding supernaturally gifted Elizabeth Bennet from the evil which surrounds her? Will he be strong enough to resist her as she grows from a precocious child into a beautiful, intelligent woman? The veil dividing the physical and spiritual planes is drawn aside to reveal warfare on an unprecedented scale as Elizabeth develops her gifts and her guardian discovers his emotions.



SoulFire, Volume II of the trilogy, continues the story, picking up January, 2008 and ending in August of the same year. Xander is in human form, using the name Fitzwilliam Darcy. SoulFire develops the actual meeting, ministry, and romance of Elizabeth and Darcy.

In the second volume of The Guardian Trilogy, Fitzwilliam Alexander Darcy, powerful Chief of all guardian angels, adjusts to life with a dual nature. An angel/human, Darcy seeks to win the love of his beautiful partner in SoulFire Ministries, Elizabeth Bennet, as they travel together across the globe. While keeping his true identity hidden, Darcy joins archangels Michael and Gabriel in defending and protecting Elizabeth from the schemes and trickery of Gregory, the Dark Prince, and Lucifer, his father.
Though the supernaturally gifted team of Darcy and Elizabeth is tremendously successful in their joint mission as they partner with evangelist Jonathan Edwards, the question remains, will Elizabeth find the strength within herself to forgive Darcy for his secrecy after she accidentally discovers the truth, that he was her guardian angel, or will Gregory be ultimately successful in separating this match made in heaven?


The Guardian Trilogy is a Christian fantasy fiction which loosely incorporates elements of Jane Austen’s masterpiece, Pride and Prejudice, into a Christian story line. Mrs. Helm is presently writing the third book in the series, Legacy.
 
 
Robin Helm taught school for twenty-five years in Florida and South Carolina - mainly high school English, music, and Bible. She now teaches elementary school music part-time for Discovery School in Lancaster, serves as Associate in Music and the Music Academy Director for Second Baptist Church, and teaches piano in the academy. Guardian is her first book, as well as the first book in The Darcy/Guardian Trilogy. The second in the series, SoulFire, is completed and should be self-published in December. She also "betas," or edits, for other authors.

She and her husband Larry have two grown daughters. One is currently serving as a nurse in the U.S. Navy in Guam, and the other is a senior at Anderson University majoring in Early Childhood/Elementary education.


Plotting for Pantsers - Meggan Connors

Welcome this morning Meggan Connors.  Please make her feel welcome!


I admit: I am a pantser.

My first novel—you know, the one hidden under the bed, or on the computer drive—was written entirely out of order. I wrote the beginning. Then I wrote a prologue. Then I wrote the end. In between, I was struggling to put together the middle. I didn't have to worry so much about the sagging middle, so much as simply having one.

My second book was written in much the same way. The plotting improved, but I wouldn't say it was perfect. I still had to go back and rewrite the whole book. At the time, I told myself it was because I write organically, and I do. But by the time I got to my third book, The Marker, I'd decided I needed to plot.

So I tried. I had character descriptions, motivations and back story all mapped out before I wrote a single word. I knew all the secondary characters, their motivations and their back stories. I had the entire story planned, complete with the conflict, the resolution, and everything that happened in between. Pages and pages of data, all of it compiled into neat little binders, every chapter carefully plotted before I'd written a single word of the actual book.

And then I got to work. I watched a blinking cursor for a long time. A long, long time.

What I realized about pantsers is that we have to allow the story to tell itself. Too much plotting ruined my story, because, in my head, the story had already been told. But just because I realized that plotting wasn't my thing doesn't mean that it isn't necessary. Plotting is good. It keeps us from derailing our story. Plotting keeps us from having to delete perfectly good chapters because now they don't fit.

So, here's what I've learned to do. I write, because I just write. Because I'm a pantser and I like to be surprised. But I also need to plot.

After I scrapped most of what I'd written about The Marker, I tried again. I kept the setting, I kept the characters, and I amended the plot. I wrote the first two chapters. Then I came up with a loose outline. A very loose outline.

It was nice. I had some elements that had to happen. That was it. How my characters got to these events was up to them. I had the organic feeling that I needed to get into a story, that feeling of excitement of not knowing. But I also felt like I had a vision for my story, that the words I was using weren't wasted. I knew I wouldn't have to go back and delete and rewrite 30,000 words of my 87,000-word document (which I've done before).

So there you have it. Writing can still be an organic process, even if you're a pantser attempting to plot. The loose outline works for me. I love having realized characters who can still surprise me, and I love having the flexibility to change them. I love seeing how they get over the hurdles I put in front of them.

At the same time, I like knowing in advance what those hurdles will be.

Sure, the loose outline thing may not work for everyone. It still means that, once I've finished the story, I will have to go back and look over the first half of the book and make sure that the beginning has characters and a setting that are as fully realized as the ending does.

But it also means that my characters have boundaries, and I, as their creator, do too. It helps maintain focus while keeping the story organic.

Because what's important is the story, not the process.

Are you a plotter or a pantser, and why? If you're a pantser, do you have any tricks to keep your characters in line? If a plotter, why and how do you plot?


Meggan Connors' debut novel, The Marker, was released in December of 2011 from Soul Mate Publishing. She would love to hear from readers, and can be found on Facebook and at http://www.megganconnors.com/.

Here's the blurb from my novel, The Marker. I hope you enjoy it!

When her father loses her in a poker game, Lexie Markland is sent to work in the household of Nicholas Wetherby for one year to pay off the debt. Innocent but not naïve, she is savvy enough to know she must maintain her distance from this man who frustrates her with his relentless teasing but whose kisses bring her to her knees. Because although she may be just another conquest to him, the marker he won at the card table, it’s not just her heart in jeopardy should she succumb to Nicholas’ considerable charms.
Since his brother’s death almost a year before, nothing has held Nicholas’ attention for long–not women, not booze, not even an excellent hand at cards. Nothing, that is, until he meets the woman he won in a drunken night of poker. Intrigued by his prize and her chilly reserve, he makes it his mission to crack Lexie’s cool demeanor. But even as passion explodes between them, the question remains: will Nicholas be able to take the ultimate risk… and gamble on love?

Blog Tour Schedule

As many of you may know by know, CRASHING HEARTS, was released January 1st via Whiskey Creek Press.  I am absolutely thrilled to have my debut novel finally out there.

To top off the excitement, I am in the midst of a blog tour to promote CRASHING HEARTS.  Please stop by on the following days if you have time.  Would love to see you stop by at any of the different blogs and leave a comment.

January 16th - Romance Book Paradise
January 18th - Kate O'Sullivan (excerpt)
January 24th - Black Velvet Seductions
January 31st - Her Story Calls
February 3rd - Heroines With Heart


Leave a comment here and you let me know where you will leave a comment on one of the above blog tour stops and you could win a signed print copy of CRASHING HEARTS.

Ebooks are available at Amazon or print copies can be ordered directly via paypal here for $12.00 each.

I look forward to seeing you around the above blogs.

Welcome Suzie Quint

Please welcome with me this morning Suzie Quint.  Suzie Quint has always been fascinated with the human psyche, so she can imagine no better way to explore the human condition than through the characters she writes. Finding the happy ending for the people who inhabit her worlds is the best job anyone could have. Getting to share them with others... It doesn't get any better than that.

Welcome, Suzie.  I'm so glad you could join me today. Today we're talking about your new release, Knight of Heart.



What motivated you to write this book?

Like so many authors these days, I became enamored with a supporting character in another book I wrote. Rachel McKnight, the heroine of Knight of Hearts, is the older sister of the hero of A Knight in Cowboy Boots. She’s a little different from the typical romance heroine though. As the oldest girl in a family with a lot of brothers, she’s more than a little bossy. She’s also a “fixer,” which is a good quality for a hotel concierge, but doesn’t work so well in her personal life.

Are the experiences in the novel based on someone you know, or events in your life?

Not particularly. I tend to think of the events of my own life as mundane. What I do take from life, I think, are the emotions. We’ve all had those moments when we’re insecure or when we pretend that we don’t care when our hearts are really breaking, or when we hope someone we love loves us back. Those feelings that are so personal to each of us but that we all share. Those are what I take from life and what, I hope, comes through in my writing.

When and why did you begin writing?

I wrote in high school, then took a long hiatus while I figured out my life. That was actually a good thing since most people have to live some, I think, before we have something to say. When I first moved to Seattle, I didn’t know very many people here and I was in one of those dry spells where I couldn’t find anything I wanted to read (this was long before Goodreads came along and I developed a to-be-read pile that would choke a giraffe.) There’s a piece of writer’s wisdom that says: write what you would want to read. So that’s what I did.

Who or what has influenced your writing, and in what way?

Every writers’ group or critique buddy I’ve ever had has had an influence my writing. My first real writers group here in Seattle probably deserves the most credit. They never let me get away with anything (for which I’m forever in their debt.) I had some horrible habits when they got their hands on me, but they pounded on me and my writing improved tremendously. Critique buddies are invaluable no matter what stage you’re at, because they spot things you’re blind to. I can’t imagine sending something out into the world without them vetting it first.

How did you come up with the title for your book(s)?

Rachel’s surname is McKnight and I played on that with her brother Zach’s book (A Knight in Cowboy Boots), so it seemed like a fun idea to start a theme with the titles. Since Mac plays a lot of poker, it felt right to find a way to reference that as well in the title, so when I came up with Knight of Hearts, I knew it fit. Though as I continue writing about the McKnight clan, I wonder what I was thinking. I may resort to having contests to come up with titles, the way Janet Evonvich does.

Is there a message in your novel that you want readers to grasp?

The theme of Knight of Hearts is about relinquishing control and learning to trust someone else, so I suppose there’s a message in that somewhere.

Who is your favorite character in the book?

I think that would be Rachel. Because she’s not fixated on being “nice” and she’s okay with that, there was a certain freedom in writing her. She’s prickly at times, bossy most of the time, and wants to be the one in control all the time. I had a ball putting her in situations where she had to struggle with those inclinations.


Is there anything additional you would like to share with your readers?

Joseph Campbell said that the purpose of mythology was to teach the ancients how to live their lives. Those myths are hard for modern cultures to apply to our daily lives, so I think in some ways the things we choose to read create our personal mythos. Romances are a great way to remind us to keep our hearts open.

Suzie, thank you so much for joining me today.  Knight of Hearts can be purchased here.



Preorder CRASHING HEARTS

Crashing Hearts is due for release in January. Here's a little tease with the first few pages.

Chapter 1

Kira Nichols pushed back her hair as the crisp salt air blew it across her face. She walked up the path—her sneakers leaving small impressions in the soft sand—to the cul-de-sac. At the empty lot across from her house, the foundation had been capped over and abandoned for about a year now.

She sprang into a run at the rumble of a sports car arriv- ing at a fast clip. She arrived at the cul-de-sac at the same time the vehicle skidded to a stop. She caught her breath as the lean, ruggedly handsome man exited his vehicle. The smile he flashed her was one she imagined had many women melting at his feet.

Kira squared her shoulders and approached him. Her five foot two inch frame seemed minute compared to his at least six foot stature. She willed herself to appear calm and not give away that her senses had completely left her at the sight of him.

“Grant Rutledge.” He extended his hand to her. His deep voice, like a shot of brandy, was warm and soothing. She swallowed hard, her anger forgotten for a brief second. Then it flared back and she ignored his hand. “Do you have any idea that there are children in this area?” she demanded, planting her hands on her hips.

“My apologies if you felt I was going too fast.” He gave an exaggerated glance around. “There aren’t any children about now.” He smiled that smile again and in spite of her anger, her heart melted. She started with the realization he still had his hand extended in introduction. She tentatively shook his calloused fingers. Tingles shot up her arm and she struggled with not yanking her hand away. Heat flooded her face. She prayed he couldn’t tell.

“Again, I apologize. I hope you wouldn’t think I have no regard for children.”

Kira turned to go. “I just know the type.” She gestured absently at the car. She forced herself to walk slowly towards her house, feeling his eyes on her back. Her mind whirled. She had practically melted at the sound of his voice. Her cheeks reddened at the thought of him watching her walk away—thankful she had stayed in shape.

The solitude of the cul-de-sac was the reason she origi- nally loved this spot. Her house had been the only one in this two-lot area for six years. She hoped the new construction company would be considerate and not disrupt the serenity, and keep working hours to normal business hours, hours when Jared was in preschool.

She thought back to the long hours they kept when they put in the foundation. Jared had been unable to sleep due to the noise and disruption of his routine. Hopefully this time around the noise wouldn’t disturb him. He was just beginning to sleep through the night.

If only she could.

* * * *

Jared ran up the walkway to meet Kira, signing furiously: “Who is that man?”

“That is Grant Rutledge,” she signed back. “He is going to be building the new house, so you will need to stay away from the construction site.”

Jared’s hands and fingers flew in his excitement to know about the new house, and the fast car he saw. “Jared, use your words.” Kira ushered him into the house.

“Car, red.”

“Yes, the car was red, and it’s very fast, so you must stay away from there.” Kira found Barbara’s eyes over Jared’s head, and gave her the “I have so much to tell you” look.

“Time to get ready for the day, Jared,” Barbara interjected.

Jared skipped off to the bedroom happily, and Barbara handed Kira a cup of coffee. “Spill. I saw him. It wasn’t the fast car that made you come into this house so quick.”

Kira, glaring at Barbara over the coffee, walked slowly to the sliding doors overlooking the ocean. “What happened to the quietness of our lives? Why do I feel like it is gone?”

“Is it gone?” Barbara asked. “Or just stirred up a little? I think maybe you’ve been holding onto grief and bitterness for so long that you don’t have any idea how to look objectively at life. Before you say it, I’m heading for the kitchen and not saying another word. Nevertheless, before I go, let me just say out of love for you, Kira, darling, Patrick’s been gone for four years now. You’ve built your life around Jared, and that’s great because Jared needs you. However, there comes a time when you need someone also, someone besides Jared and an old lady like myself.”

“Barb, it’s not like that.”

“Honey, you’ve been holding on for so long, and don’t tell me you’re not angry with Patrick for the way he left the night of the accident. Kira, I’m angry with him. He never should’ve left that way. You had it just as tough as him, if not more, with the crying. He was the father. He should have been here right beside you.”

“Stop! We are not going to rehash that night and we certainly aren’t going to blame Patrick. He’s gone and nothing is going to change that.” Kira looked toward the ocean and for- got about her coffee and Barbara. For a moment she lost track of the here and now and drifted off into the peace of the ocean.

Something caught Kira’s eye, and she turned to see Grant taking measurements, preparing for the construction. Feelings she hadn’t felt in so long flooded her as she watched his dark, wavy hair blow in the breeze. Half sighing, half growling to herself, she turned from the window. Distractions were not what she needed now. There was a routine to follow. For Jared’s sake.

***

Preorders for your signed copy of CRASHING HEARTS can be ordered via paypal here for $12.00 each or contact me directly to arrange payment.

Christmas

Christmas was my favorite time of the year when I was a child. Isn't it everyone's? Even as my kids were little, I loved Christmas. Seeing their faces when they opened their presents, the joy they had as they got older and buying gifts for people less fortunate then themselves. It was a great time. As time goes by, Christmas tends to stress me out more and more and I just don't enjoy it like I used to. Trees are hard to find. We always cut our own, but I have developed an allergy to all Christmas trees except Scotch Pines. They are becoming increasingly difficult to find and how I fight against having to get a fake tree. Everything is so expensive. This year as I sit in my living room looking at the bare tree, yet to be decorated, I remember the peace that comes with Christmas also. The evenings of sitting with the lights off, except for the lights on the tree, and just enjoying it. It really doesn't matter the amount of gifts around the tree, its the joy of always having my family close. This year will be no exception as my oldest daughter travels from North Caroline to be home for the holidays. The family grows this year with the addition of our first grandson who is just fascinated with the tree. One of my fondest memories is of my kids being very little and sitting in front of the Christmas tree with just the lights on as we sang Christmas songs. The simple things of being with family and just enjoying each other is really all I need for Christmas. What's your wish for the Christmas season?

Why Do We Hurt The Ones We Love

As we grow closer to the Christmas time many things go through my mind. To me, holidays are a source of huge stress. What used to be my favorite time of the year has become a time I would prefer to hide from. Holidays should be a time of loved ones coming together and enjoying the time together. Instead, with all the added stress, it tends to have love ones hurting each other. Why do we do this? When does it become a time of not being selfish and self-centered and really setting aside the pettiness? In the past year for numerous reason time and time again it has been reiterated to me that time is short. Life comes with no guarantees and it is in those difficult times that you hold on to love ones to get you through it. So why do the loved ones lash out or shut down and push you away whenever they feel they just don't want to stop being selfish? For the simple reason of it is easier. It is easier to be hurtful and lash out than to show love in spite of the hurtful coming at you. It is easier to shut oneself away than to put yourself out there for rejection. But if you truly love these people, when is it time for fight for that relationship and not let it just slide past you because it is easier? Do you just write people off as "they will never change" just because you don't want to change to stop the cycle? Why do we hurt the ones we love?